The energy flow!

Wow, I can not even explain the energy difference I feel being sober. I am accomplishing things I’ve had on my to do list for a long time and things I would brush under the rug. I’m very excited about it!

I’ve set up the cabin, set up a new recording studio, started new workout routine, and I have been up early to read and do my morning routine. I normally would be feeling like crap in bed for most of the morning hungover and not accomplishing much.

I’m not feeling the normal things I’ve felt in the past about sobriety. Normally I feel like I can’t wait until the experiment is over so I can drink again. This time feels different. It feels like a true life change.

My blood labs came back terrible. I had them drawn two days after Christmas. My weight was at an all time high and I had certainly overindulged on foods and drinks. My doctor was not happy with me. I wasn’t happy with me either! I had avoided doing labs for over a year due to covid. It may be just what I needed. I think it may have inspired me even more to do what I’ve been putting off for 5 plus years- living my BEST life!

I am enjoying seeing life differently so far. Seeing things for what they are. Not escaping them. Doing things I have always wanted to do. Not avoiding them to go drink. Being present for my family. Not escaping to drink. Enjoying the process. Not rushing to get through it. Completing the whole workout slowly. Not skipping half of it because I “don’t have time”.

I have been working hard to get to this mental place through many years of struggle. I think maybe, just maybe, I’m finally getting it. I will keep praying it is so! I don’t want to be the person I was last year. I want to be the new me. The one I envision when I think of me happy.

I never thought it would be so darn much work!

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